A Review of The Walking Dead Based Only on Spoilers
If I wanted to see teeming masses of mindless husks shuffling around without any ambition other than the unending desire to consume, I'd go to an Apple store. [...]
humor
Fifty Shades of Grey Was the Worst Movie I Have Ever Seen at 7:45 Last Monday Night
Does this film degrade modern cinema, and the whole of culture by extension? I have no idea, but it certainly was the low point of my cultural perspective for about half an evening. [...]
Godiva Chocolates Gold Box: The Perfect Gift for Your Lunatic Valentine!
Sure, it was still a couple days until Valentine's Day, but I just couldn't contain myself. I wanted to see her again, even if she was a violently unstable potential murderer. [...]
4 Sad Movies Reviewed Solely by Their Wikipedia Plot Summaries
I don't have the energy to sit through two hours of actors making sad faces. There is enough drama and whining on my real life Facebook feed, so I don't need movies adding to it. [...]
A Review of the Chipotle I Just Robbed
I got no time for disrespect. What I do got time for though is delicious food. You bitches stick by me and I’ll tell you all about the tastiest shit you can shove into your teeth cave. [...]
I Guess I Just Hate Children – A Review of Harry Potter
I don't think these books are corrupting kids with their subtle Satanic messages. If anything, I wish they were. At least then these little bastards would have something interesting about them. [...]
Trojan Gold Collection Condoms: Ribbed for Murder!
I personally have been consistently awful at the art of the pick-up, which has not led me to become overly optimistic about my prospects. That and the fact that my last attempt at seducing a lady ended with my house nearly being burned down. [...]
A Review of Interstellar Based Only on Google Image Searches
Director Christopher Nolan’s long-anticipated space masterpiece is finally here, but if you think I’m going to pay nineteen dollars to see a thirty foot tall [...]
Screw You Malcolm Gladwell, I Bet I Could Do It in Just 9,000 Hours: A Review of Outliers
Since its publication in 2008, Outliers has often been cited as a revelatory look at what makes prominent individuals so successful. In it, author Malcolm Gladwell posits [...]
A Review of The Hunger Games Based Solely on its Wikipedia Plot Summary
Yes, you read the title correctly. I’ve got a lot of things going on in my life. If you think I’m going to take the time to watch a movie or – god forbid [...]
Axe Gold Temptation: Irresistible to Beautiful Women and Dangerous Psychopaths
For me, the first image that Axe Body Spray evokes is the boys locker room in 8th grade. A kid named Eddie would constantly spray himself with the stuff until it gave his [...]
4 Literary Classics That Fail to Meet My Jealous Standards
You might be wondering why I, Gus Harrington, renowned book critic, had not previously read the literary and cultural classics featured on this list. The reason, quite simply [...]
Month in Review: Halloween Edition!
The staff of Reviews of the Month proudly presents a selection of the most notable items that have come to our attention in the past month. And just in time for every [...]
Art: Four Bricks and Stick
For the uninitiated reader, the following review techniques might seem a tad over-zealous. Thus, let me forestall any confusion: I, Mona St. Westberg, Reviews of the Month [...]
Halloween Candy!
Awww, yeah ladies! You know what time it is? It’s Chris Derricks-thirty! That’s right! I’m straight back from my house arrest, and ready to slip my turgid review right [...]
Bad Axe
Like any civilized person in 21st century America, I have no use for a fireplace. I push a button on the wall and my house gets warm. Bam, technology. No sweeping the [...]
Choose Your Own Life
Choose-your-own-adventure books are not exactly the cornerstone of the literary industry. Despite seeing a modicum of success in the children’s market of decades past, the [...]
Dysentery Arises
Way back in 1981, when progressive rock titans Dysentery Arises announced they had a vision for a career-spanning nine-album conceptual rock opera, there were few who thought [...]
Website: My Racist Grandma
There seems to have become a gold rush of sorts to mine the comedic wealth of the unsuspecting elderly. An Old Rush, if you will. The old axiom “kids say the darnedest [...]
Art: Dark Lines Will Consume You
Robert Haggis Ink & Photoshop on canvas (2013) Robert Haggis is one of the most outstanding artists of the decade. With each new work he [...]
Food: Mayonnaise On The Bottom Yogurt
‘Sup homies, Chris Derricks here. I’m laying low for the next couple weeks, mostly due to the house arrest (don’t ask). It’s not a big deal, I’ve got a big [...]
Product: Ant Murder!
Spring is in the air! A joyous time that heralds the stirrings of warmth, the choirs of birds, and the blossoming of flowers. But as the world of beauty wrests itself from [...]
Book: Life is Hard and I am Sad
Where once I could create an insightful and entertaining introduction paragraph, now that ability, along with what I assume are several other important cognitive functions, [...]
Internet Memes: Not as Innocent as They Seem
Internet memes are a phenomenon that run the gamut from entertaining to infuriating, from clever to incomprehensibly stupid. Examining the ebb and flow of these memes [...]
The Double Thumb 